Overdue update

Have fallen behind catching up with blogger people lately; I apologize, I suck. :P

Unfortunately, not many updates. After being shot down for that last job when I was so close, I'm feeling a little hopeless and have to keep reminding myself that there's life after this place. It's like a mantra. I'd put it on a sticky on my monitor, except that people would probably notice (it could go next to the FOCUS! and "don't forget who you are, and by the way, get off your butt and go to the gym" stickies). I'm hanging in there, though.

Interesting conversation a couple weeks ago. I was in line with my husband getting some hot chocolate and a coworker of his says, "I heard you want to be an EMT."

If I'd had the hot chocolate already, I probably would have choked on it, because I didn't think this was a commonly known thing. Apparently, my husband has told a number of people. Either that's a vote of support, or he thinks I'm crazy. Although knowing my husband, it's a vote of support because he's just that way. The only thing stopping us right now is money.

I hate money. I talked with my future sister-in-law recently, and she said that she didn't care about money. It's all fine and good to say that, but in the end, it puts the roof over your head and food on the table. It's not everything, but the nature of the beast is that you can't live without it. And my future sister-in-law says that admittedly as someone who is not working (my brother pays for all her bills and stuff, which isn't great as he isn't making all that much himself).

I'm getting quite a few pings about my resume, and I'll be doing some followups soon on those oportunities. I keep reminding myself that I'm very lucky - there's much worse places to be, but I know that it's a matter of time for me. Best I can expect on my next review is "meets expectations" because I don't do much programming, and at the end of this product cycle, that's mostly likely going to translate to a layoff. Not because of my performance so much as the fact that they want my sort of position to be at a certain "level", and I fall one level short. Even if I kick some butt, it's not likely I'll get the promotion to that level in time.

If I stay here, though, worst case scenario, I put up with the BS for another 8 months, and they lay me off. In which case, I get a sizable severence package and have some breathing room to look for a job full time.

In other news, I've picked up a potentially dangerous addiction in the form of Guild Wars. Way to see my home life productivity go down the toilet, but a startlingly good way to cope with stress. It can be stressful dying over and over, of course, but really, the game is risk free - it's pretty hard to screw up so bad that you can't undo it.

Keeping my chin up, and making the first solid steps towards getting my finances in order so that I can make all this actually happen, getting out of the software industry.