Backfire

I can't believe this.

I had a company interested in me. I love the idea of the company and how they do things, but it's in Seattle and I'm not so sure I want to commute over there (as right now, hubby and I drive together and I really like that). But, I really had some people pushing to get me the phone screens, so sure, I figured, what the hell.

Screen one is easy. It's the HR kind of one, finding out stuff about me, ect. Cake. By this point, though, I'm starting to second guess this idea of working in Seattle. Second phone screening comes along, and I'm thinking well... Crap. I'm not really sure if commuting to Seattle is such a good idea, and I have people telling me I'm crazy for wanting to leave MS, but I've already got the second screening scheduled.

I figured, I'll just be kind of crappy in the interview, and that'll be that. I give decent answers, but I'm brutally honest about my lousy programming skills, and I'm a little bit eh on the testing parts, too.

The recruiter who'd been working with me asked how it went. I kind of shrugged and said it was okay, but I didn't think I really bowled them over. I'm thinking to myself, hell, in fact I kind of tried to botch it.

So imagine my surprise when I check my mail and find out they want to do an in person interview. They *like* me.

WTF? I can not figure this out.

I'm thinking if they like me based on lackluster replies and want me in, what the hell. If they're thinking I'm that qualified based on me at my worst, wonder what they'll think when I give my best? Worst case, I don't get the job, or I get it and turn it down. Best case, I get myself into a cool little company.

My only concern is that the job is contract to hire - I'd be a temp for a while, and if they like me, they'll hire me. It would mean I would risk leaving behind my permanant job, but then again, I had recruiters harassing me for vendor work (sort of like temp work but more stable), and while it's a slight paycut, it is certainly a safety net.

This is freaking surreal at this point. I finally try to screw something up and I get it right. Hell of a world sometimes. Holding out on any concrete decisions until the interview process is complete; I keep bantering around the whole thing in my head, but really, I can't make any decisions one way or another until the interview is done.

Damn. One downside is that the commute would be funky, and I'd have to arrange a lot of parts of my life. It might also put off me getting into volunteer EMS, but then again, I might find I have a supportive workplace that's cool about me leaving a tad early sometimes for meetings or shifts.

So freaked out now.